That is that

I was in a better place today, until I turned on the news. Dude. Welcome to the 1920 again. I hope you know how to make your own cloths, because we are headed into another depression. If it is not mother nature turning on us, it is our own country. We are all in trouble and eventually it will effect you in one way or another!!!

Have I found our solution??

After nights of not sleeping, I think I have found an answer. I just hope it is the right solution. I hope by fixing one problem, I am not creating another. How do you know that you are doing the right thing? Really, how do you know. What if this sounds good now, but it leaves us high and dry in 3 months. Again, I freaking hate money.

Dear family

I just wanted to let each and every family member know how much I love and miss you. I feel horrible for not being a good niece and going to visit my sick uncles. I do not do well with sick family. I wish I could be strong, but just looking at Aunt Mary's pictures today made me cry. I can not do it. If I was a stronger person, I would be able to say this to you in person. That being said, please don't think less of me, because my thoughts truly are with you and I do love you. I am here for you if you need me, please do not hesitate to call, text or email me. I would drop everything for you. Love Cori.

What have I done

Wish I could lift this fog. Step out from behind this mood I have entered. Turn on the lights, I am having a hard time seeing what I have come here for. There is just nothing I can do, but to keep going and try to find the way out. It has to be here somewhere, right?

IDK

I'm walking on a long path to nowhere



How do I keep carrying on when I always getting let down? How do I run on empty and still move around?



Here I am again, repeating these same two words to you....IM SORRY!



I can lie about how I feel,But eventually it's going to get to hard to hide the feelings.

101 ways to cope with stress... yeah right.

101 WAYS TO COPE WITH STRESS
Courtesy of the Tripler Army Medical Center, Honolulu, Hawaii
Get up 15 minutes earlier
Prepare for the morning the night before
Avoid tight fitting clothes
Avoid relying on chemical aids
Set appointments ahead
Don't rely on your memory ... write it down
Practice preventive maintenance
Make duplicate keys
Say "no" more often
Set priorities in your life
Avoid negative people
Use time wisely
Simplify meal times
Always make copies of important papers
Anticipate your needs
Repair anything that doesn't work properly
Ask for help with the jobs you dislike
Break large tasks into bite size portions
Look at problems as challenges
Look at challenges differently
Unclutter your life
Smile
Be prepared for rain
Tickle a baby
Pet a friendly dog/cat
Don't know all the answers
Look for a silver lining
Say something nice to someone
Teach a kid to fly a kite
Walk in the rain
Schedule play time into every day
Take a bubble bath
Be aware of the decisions you make
Believe in yourself
Stop saying negative things to yourself
Visualize yourself winning
Develop your sense of humor
Stop thinking tomorrow will be a better today
Have goals for yourself
Dance a jig
Say "hello" to a stranger
Ask a friend for a hug
Look up at the stars
Practice breathing slowly
Learn to whistle a tune
Read a poem
Listen to a symphony
Watch a ballet
Read a story curled up in bed
Do a brand new thing
Stop a bad habit
Buy yourself a flower
Take time to small the flowers
Find support from others
Ask someone to be your "vent-partner"
Do it today
Work at being cheerful and optimistic
Put safety first
Do everything in moderation
Pay attention to your appearance
Strive for Excellence NOT perfection
Stretch your limits a little each day
Look at a work of art
Hum a jingle
Maintain your weight
Plant a tree
Feed the birds
Practice grace under pressure
Stand up and stretch
Always have a plan "B"
Learn a new doodle
Memorize a joke
Be responsible for your feelings
Learn to meet your own needs
Become a better listener
Know your limitations and let others know them, too
Tell someone to have a good day in pig Latin
Throw a paper airplane
Exercise every day
Learn the words to a new song
Get to work early
Clean out one closet
Play patty cake with a toddler
Go on a picnic
Take a different route to work
Leave work early (with permission)
Put air freshener in your car
Watch a movie and eat popcorn
Write a note to a far away friend
Go to a ball game and scream
Cook a meal and eat it by candlelight
Recognize the importance of unconditional love
Remember that stress is an attitude
Keep a journal
Practice a monster smile
Remember you always have options
Have a support network of people, places and things
Quit trying to fix other people
Get enough sleep
Talk less and listen more
Freely praise other people
BONUS: Relax, take each day at a time...you have the rest of your life to live!



What a joke.

Cori's bad bad mood

I have not enjoyed work the last week. I can not put my finger on exactly why. I think it is a lot of different things that add up to unhappiness. I have been a head cashier for 1 year now. I loved my job until the last week. I think other peoples negative attitudes are rubbing off on to me, and that makes me very mad.

There is a part time position open that I wanted, it is a sign making job. It is what it sounds like. It is a 20 hour a week job making and hanging signs. That would be my only responsibility while making signs. I would still be a head cashier, but I would make signs also. I could not do both jobs at the same time, so I would have to dedicate certain days for each job. Not a big deal, but I could make it work. I just need a break. I want to love my job again. I wish I could work 40 hours a week, and split it between the sign making job and being a head cashier. I just can not come up with that much time, and still be a productive member of society. I need sleep too. If I did not have to get up at 8am to get the boy ready for school, I could stay later at the Poe, but the truth is, 12am is the latest I can physically put in at work and still be ok. Again, I wish I could find the time to do everything I wanted to do at work. Damn time and its restrictions.

I am super excited about next weekend. I took Friday-Tuesday off for the Columbus weekend before it was canceled. I could have canceled my vacation, but that would be crazy. John decided to take a 3 day weekend so we could spend some quality time as a family. I can not wait. We have to finish our bedroom. I know what your thinking, what could she possible add... it is beautiful as is. Our closet is a mess. I would love to be able to actually put my clothes away and not just leave them on the kitchen table or the dryer. Sounds like a plan doesn't it!!! The closet is not that big, bit I think once I go through all the cloths that are in there, and get rid of all the old stuff, I will have plenty of room. We also have a dresser that we have not used for over a year and a half. The dresser is big, but the drawers are not that useful, so I can not put lots of things in there. I plan on putting shelves in the middle of the closet, to divide it in half. That way John will have his side and I will have mine. The shelves will be for tee shirts and shorts. I figure I will put strange things that never fold well in the dresser... socks and underwear, swimsuits, unmentionables ect... . I want to say it will not be that much work, but usually when I say that, it turns into a 4 week project. Wish me luck!!! Don't worry, I will post before and after pictures!!

Interested???

I have some of my Halloween decorations on Ebay right now. Here are the item numbers... 150298998743, 150298984817, 150298987009, 150298992766 ( just copy and paste). Worth the time to stop by. I have yet to sell a thing, so I am hopping this will be it. I really wish I could get that first dollar to frame. The beginning!! Look out world, here comes Cori. Some day I will have my own magazine and show just like Martha!!!

Stress

Stress is a horrible thing. I am stressed. I hate money. I love the things I can buy with it, but hate how much I owe people. Again, I hate money.

Halloween signs

Here are 2 signs I made tonight. Nice huh!!!

More bedroom pictures

I got the pictures back yesterday, and here is the final product. I also got the prints I won on Ebay, but need to find frames for them still. Keep your eyes peeled for those snap shots!!!

Poopy days

I have had two poopy days in a row. It all started on Friday night when Bella came down with a fever. She went down for her nap just fine, and woke up with a fever. I don't have a thermometer so I am not sure how high it was. I gave her some meds and she was ok for the rest of the night. She was still warm, but felt better. When I came home that night, she was asleep, and moaning while she slept. I was worried, but I just left her alone and went to bed around 1am. She woke up crying at 1:30 and just burning up. Well, needless to say, I was up all night. Even when she went back to sleep, I could not sleep. I have never been so worried about her before. She was so sick. I had to call in late on Saturday so I could sleep for a while. She ended up being fine on Saturday. It was almost as if she was not even sick anymore. Any way, that put me in a super bad mood at work Saturday night. I was soooo tired. I then had to go home (at 11pm), go to bed and wake up at 5am and do it again. Well, guess who did not set her alarm right last night?!?! That's right, I was 1 hour late for freaking work today. That just set off the rest of today for me. Now I am super sleepy, and have a headache. I am going to go to bed, and start off my weekend. Good night all.

We are done!!!!

Here are the pictures of our bedroom. We finally got the box springs yesterday and John had the bed put together when I got home. I have won some stuff off Ebay, and am waiting for them. Also I had some of the pictures we took on our super awesome vacation in May blown up and turned black and white. I am going to frame them in big black frames. I ordered six of them and they are going to go on the wall above the dresser. On Ebay I won some replicas of lighthouse plans. They are really cool and I can not wait to get them. The theme I am going for is ... hard to explain, but I will try. I want it to be like you are at a nice hotel at the ocean. I don't want a bunch of lighthouses around, but just hints of them in places. I would love to find a lighthouse lamp, one that is again not big an tacky. Any way... here are the pictures. Notice the shine on the yellow part of the walls, that is the candlelight paint I was talking about. I freaking love it!! I am also going to get allot of plants to put in there. I am not sold on the bed set, I think I settled on it, but some day I will have what I am looking for. Ps... the bed is so tall that I have to lift myself up into it. I asked John how he got in it!! He may need a stepladder!! Just kidding. It is not as shinny in real life, but the flash really picked up on it. It is worth the trip to Shelton to come look at it!!!

What did Cori eat today?

So, I did pretty good. I did, however, have some salad dressing with my veggies. While I was cooking dinner, I snacked on tomatoes with salad dressing. Here is my theory on dressing... if your eating veggies, and you put a little fat on them, who cares. The point is you eating the freaking veggies, right? It is not like I went to McDonald's and got the 2 for $3 Big Macs, oh man that sounds good. Other than that I did good. I ended up drinking 3 full liters of water. I have been peeing like crazy. I only hope my skin clears up from all this water. I am still having a very hard time coming up with time going to the gym. I am sure it will all work out, but for now I will just have to fit it in when I have the time. I really feel like having some salad right now, but I am watching Ghost Hunters, and I am too scared to go in the kitchen. I wish John was awake with me right now, I really am hungry.

So today...

I actually got some things done today!! I washed the kids bedding, deep cleaned the kitchen floor, straitened up Bella's room, and last night (after the kids went to bed) I deep cleaned the living room. When John gets home we are going to go grocery shopping.

We are going to give this eating right thing a try again. We are going to follow the Biggest Loser (starts tonight). The gym thing will have to wait for a few more days. We have been so busy, every second of our time together is being used to clean. paint or do something. I think we are going to have to wait until Monday to start. The only problem I am finding is... Monday is the only day we can work out together without something getting in the way. Sunday the daycare is not open. Tuesday the boy has Cub Scouts. Wednesday John gets off work right when I have to go to work. Thursday we could meet there after he gets off, and before I go in to work. Friday is like Wednesday. Saturday I work all day. I could go, but I would have to pay the sitter for 2 extra hours. That brings us to Sunday again. I could work out by myself, but we will see. I am usually beat by Sunday afternoon. Cub Scouts are only once or twice a month, so we could meet at the gym on the days he doesn't have a den meeting.

I am so disappointed in myself. I can not believe I let all that hard work go down the drain. I guess I always had the thought in the back of my head, that I could just start again and it would be easy. Now I am second thinking that. It is going to be just as hard now as it was when we first started. Plus now we have less time. I think I am going to be picking up more hours at THD, and doing that means I will be staying later. I just really don't know when I will fit it in. I need need need to work out to lose weight. And I need to lose weight. I just want to weigh 190. That is not asking too much. I have no idea what I weigh right now, but I am guessing that I have gained most of it back. I have really noticed in the last few weeks all the lumps and bumps that were not there a few months ago. On top of that, all the cloths that I make myself fit into, are tight again. How utterly disappointing. Why is it that the good things in life are so bad for me. I don't understand it. How can one person be so strong, and I am so weak. I just wish crappy food (aka good for you food) tasted like Mc Donald's, or Burger King. Well, I don't promise much, but I am going to give it a try again. I hope watching the Biggest Loser tonight inspires me. Wish me luck!!

Lets see now

Ok, about my toe. It is doing good. I managed to wear shoes for my 2 8 hours shifts. It is doing really well, few more days and I wont even remember it happened.

Bedroom... I got the candle light paint up. I have mixed feelings on it. I think I like it, but I think it needs a second coat. I feel like I could have done better at painting it, and it would not need a second coat. I hope it is ok to put 2 coats on it, because I am going to do it in about 30 minutes.

Our bed... Got our mattress, Bella's mattress and the chair, but our box spring will not be here until next week. Damn it. Got to sleep on the mattress last night and it is soooo much nicer than the piece of crap we have been living on for the last year. I can only imagine what it will be like with the box spring.

Today our goals consist of... deep clean the living room, sweep and mop the kitchen, laundry, wash the kids bedding, finish painting my bedroom, clean the toilets, put our bedroom furniture back, grocery shop, pick Spencer up at school and then head into Olympia and go to the Cider Mill. After the kids go to bed, we need to cut some more wood so I can make more signs, but this is on the bottom of my list of things to get done today, because I have tomorrow off too and can do that tomorrow night. If I get Johns help today, I know this stuff will get done, if I wait until tomorrow and do it all myself, it will not get done. For some reason I need him to motivate me.

So here it is almost noon already, and John is asleep in the new chair, and I am blogging. I guess we will NOT be getting everything done today. Oh well. I am off to paint my room!!!!

ps, boo boo

Bye the bye, my boo boo is doing good. So far, no sign of infection. Yeah!!! Still not going to wear my shoe, my goal is tomorrow. We will see!!

My bedroom

Well, we got the color on the walls of our bedroom. We painted the top half and the ceiling a beautifully warm yellow. Then we added a chair rail (it matches the door and window frames), painted it, the walls and trim on the bottom white. Today I am going to put the candlelight paint on the yellow parts. The candle light paint is a paint that adds sparkle to the color on the bottom. It doesn't really change the color of the paint, but just adds a texture that makes the room shine when the lights are on low, or if you are burning some candles. The texture resembles frost on a window, the way it reaches and connects. I have not seen it used before, but this is what the paint samples look like. I hope it works, it is $50 a gallon!!! We get our bed on Sunday, and then the room will be beautiful. I just can not wait to go to bed on Sunday night. I was going to get a new comforter, but I am a bit concerned about money. If I can find what I am looking for that is under $50, I may get it. I am sure I can find it at Walmart. God bless Walmart!! I am thinking something with reds and greens. I want the decor to be something that reminds me of being at Long Beach, or Florence. I love the feeling being in an old hotel at the beach gives me, and that is what I want our bedroom to feel like. I have bid on some really old sepia postcards from Heceta Head Lighthouse, and I am sure I will win. I also already have one from the Sea lion caves, it is old as well, from the 1940's. I plan on putting them in some big chunky black frames. I think the red that I find in a comforter and the black in the frames I place around the room will help me bring the lighthouse theme in. I don't want just any lighthouses, I want a very specific old look. I will know it when I see it. I just hope it will all look the way I want it to. I will post pictures when the bed is in, perhaps with a new comforter!!!

Boo boo update

I managed to keep my toe safe at work. I never found the "shoe" I was looking for, but I found some sandals that worked. Plus it was black so it matched my shirt!! I felt like a douche walking around with a tennis shoe on one foot and a sandal on the other, but at least I went to work!!!

My boo boo

So, if you don't know, I am accident pron. I especially am good at hurting my feet. This week has been a doosy... it started when I caught my baby toe on the baby gate and took a good chunk out of it. Whatever, I dealt with that one. Then on Sunday I found a sewing pin, with my middle toe. Again, not all that bad, the bleeding stopped eventually. Yesterday was the straw that broke my foot. I went to turn the heater on (by the way, it is September and I should not have to do that) and turned around and took a step. I was not watching where I was going and kicked the underside of the kids table that was upside down (Bella uses it as a dance floor). I had never noticed the massive razors installed, well ok, there were not really any razors, but it felt like it. I did some major damage to my big toe. I should have gone to the doctor for some stitches, but that would have been too much work. The pain is unmeasurable. I am having a hard time walking, and keep kicking things with it!! I will not be able to wear a shoe at work tonight, and there is a strict shoe requirement at THD. I called Kevin, the store manager, and he said that it would be ok if I got one of those shoes you wear over a cast. I think he is just glad I am coming to work still. I just hope they come in pink!!! When John saw it, he yelled at me for not going to the doctor. I have never cut myself bad enough, I have never needed stitches, so how was I to know?!?! Any who, it is too late, and it really does feel better than it did yesterday, except when I kick it. I will be making a trip to the local drug store and getting some padding for it, because I will NOT be hitting it on something at work tonight. It is the kind of pain that makes you want to throw up, and bad words come spewing from the head.

What to say today

I am in a bad mood. I am a little frustrated with work right now, and have some things to deal with. I only hope they go my way.

All I can think about right now is all the things I have to do... paint the trim for my bedroom, paint my room, get some more things made for the garage sale I have mentally set up for the weekend of the 21st, make the Halloween decorations for the yard, bug bomb the house. I am sure there is more, but these are the only ones coming to mind right now.

I should just go to bed... tomorrow is going to come quickly. Good night y'all.

Guess what!!

So John and I have been sleeping on a mattress on the floor for a year now. My old body can NOT handle it any more. We went out yesterday and purchased a mattress for us and one for when Bella is old enough. We also got a new recliner. I am super stoked, but we have to wait 10 days for our stuff to come in. Poop. My gosh, I can not even picture what a good nights sleep will feel like. I am sooooo excited. We got a good one too, cost a ton of money. We had to get the split box springs because we could not fit a normal one up the stairs (the reason we were sleeping on the floor in the first place). Do you know how freaking expensive a split queen size box spring cost!?!? 300.00 freaking dollars!!! Highway robbery I tell you.

The chair was a last minute thing, but John has always wanted a nice recliner, and now he has one. This one chair cost more than our couch and love seat together. Merry Christmas John!!! God bless 0% financing!!!

So for Christmas I am going to redo Bella's bedroom, make it all pretty. I was debating getting her a new bed or just using Spencer's toddler bed. When this opportunity came up, we had to get her a new bed. We only got her a mattress, because I am going to make her headboard myself. We also passed on the box spring for her, because this way she is closer to the floor if she falls out, plus the sales person said we did not need one with the mattress we got. Her bed was only $150.00, crazy talk. I will have to visit the Goodwill for the parts for her frame, or Craig's list. Now I just have to find the perfect green comforter for her bed, so I can add patchwork to it.

First day of First Grade

So yesterday we went to Spencer's school for orientation. He got to meet his teacher Mrs. Wilson-Hoss, she seems nice. I was glad that his classroom was close to the door, that way he can find it by himself tomorrow when I just drop him off. While we were there we got information on Boy Scouts, got him a Bordeaux Bulldog teeshirt and prepaid for some hot lunches. It was fun. Last year we were in the moving process and could not really enjoy this knowing we were only going to be there for a month or so. Today John stayed home in the morning so we could all take him to school. He looked so handsome, I was very proud. Best dressed kid in Shelton, without a doubt!!!!

First day pictures. Too cute for words.

Yes, we followed him inside the school. I had to make sure my baby made it in OK. I have yet to hear from the school, so I am sure he is doing fine. I am going to get ready for work now, so I can meet him at the front door when he gets out.