Friday, March 13, 2009

Is a change in the air?

So I have been putting some real thought into what I should be. I love working at The Home Depot, but I am 31, and it is time for me to be what I want to be. I can not go through life just being. I need more than that. I need to be something that makes people proud. After much thought, I think I have come up with what will make me happy, or at least I hope it will make me happy. I just worry about my age, weight and time left. I am 5 months pregnant, and fat. I need to be in shape to be what I want to be, and for me to do that, I need a year. That is 5 months to be pregnant, and 6 months to work on getting healthy.

Here's the thing, I work just under 30 hours a week, more like 25. I only bring home $700 a month. That is just not enough. I don't ask for millions of dollars, I just want to be a mother of 3, in a nice home, with decent cars, and decent clothes. Even if those decent clothing come from Walmart, I am ok with that. I want vacations with my kids, and to not have to hear Spencer say "I know we don't have any money...". Gosh, I never knew how often I said that, until he started repeating me. That is sad. I want to retire some day, and that is just not going to happen if we keep this up. I need to start my career, and stop working at my job. I want to help my husband pay the bills. How freaking rad would it be to make more money than him!! I don't know that I have ever done that.

I just feel like I have to hurry up and wait around. Is there always going to be something that stops me from doing what I should be doing? And by that, I mean will I always stop myself?

2 comments:

Randi said...

I think you have the most important job right now..... and that is to treasure and take care of those beautiful children. Money isn't worth the memories you will always have. Cherish it and enjoy it.

Cori's Stories said...

As right as you are, it is just really hard to not stress about money ALL THE TIME. It is having a toll on my husband and I.